TED 2 Review – A Raucous, Raunchy, Bromance Ride

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TED 2, from Universal Pictures, presents an edgy, frat house, party bus weekend, trip as they travel the extremes of acceptability skating the point of no return with sophomoric jokes and counter culture references.

Written and Directed by Seth MacFarlane, TED 2 stars a host of very familiar faces including Mark Wahlberg, Amanda Seyfried, Jessica Barth, Giovanni Ribisi, John Carrol Lynch, Sam J. Jones, Patrick Warburton, Michael Dorn, John Slattery, Dennis Haysbert, Ron Canada with Liam Neeson, Morgan Freeman, Tom Brady, Patrick Stewart, Jimmy Kimmel and Jay Leno.  Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild served as co-writers along with Macfarlane.

TED 2 opens with an historic pairing as the Ted, voiced by Seth MacFarlane, and the love of his life, Southie girl, Tami-Lynn, played by Jessica Barth, marries her favorite cuddly bear. The wedding scenes introduce the cast of characters, Guy and Rick, a gay urban couple who show up sporadically through the film, the minister, Sam Jones played by Sam J. Jones who also returns mid film.

The two, John and Ted, are still living a bromance life, even after Ted marries Tami-Lynn and after only a year the marriage begins to deteriorate.

The newlyweds move into the terrible two’s and are just past their first year anniversary when, we find the romantic cuddly bear Ted has been replaced by the beast as he pours over the bills and his loving wifey is tossing the iron skillet at him as they trade insults over her spending and his penis.

Ted, of course, after the fighting wants to make up. Tami-Lynn will have none of it. So Ted solicits advice into the female psyche, from fellow cashier Joy who suggests they have a baby to improve their marriage.

Suddenly Tami-Lynn and Ted are snug as a bug in a rug and are cooing love birds again until the one minor and seemingly obvious necessity absent from our anatomically incorrect bear stops the traditional baby making method.

This is where our story begins to unfold as Ted and Tami-Lynn find their wild and raucous pasts have made them less than an ideal choices for adoption and drug use has deteriorated her vagina and rendered it useless. A shock to all.

John, played by Mark Wahlberg, while happy for his best friend, is missing a relationship. The absence of his drinking, bromance bud as left a vacancy in his life that we find out later is being filled in a darkened room behind the safety of a computer screen with the countless couplings available through the Internet.

The boys are a bit freer in their description of the computer files and the need to destroy the hard drive on the off chance anyone finds the drive and reconstructs the contents.

Soon the desire to have a baby has been sidelined as the Commonwealth has determined Ted is property and suddenly his life dries up, not recognized as human he losses all he has done to establish himself.

Ready for the fight, the two find the toughest Boston constitutional lawyer who introduces them to, his fresh out of law school granddaughter, Samantha a pot smoking, uber legal brainiac, pop culture illiterate played by Amanda Seyfried.

What follows is an extended frat house weekend as the three prepare for an unprecedented Constitutional battle. Seriously into the weed, the three exam the varying strains and effects with gusto which brings into play the various methods used for consumption.

Jay Leno appears in cameo. Liam Neesom appears with as a paranoid cereal eater, Tom Brady, New England Patriot Quarterback shows up with solid balls and Morgan Freeman appears as a Constitutional lawyer, who explains the meaning of citizen.

As I usually don't go for the sophomoric humor and TED 2 was better than I thought. Granted there are moments of raunchy mess as the two visit a sperm donor clinic and lots of penis, pot and partying jokes, along with visuals of a counter culture freedom.

Macfarlane and Wahlberg kept the jokes coming and Amanda Seyfriend mixes the life of legal and illegal with the same enthusiasm as our two best buds, John and Ted.  

Barth carries the silly intellectually challenged blonde stereotype story line and love’s obvious blindness effortlessly. The talented cast shows the ability of an actor to be and to be believed.

TED 2 opens June 26, 2015. Check local listings.

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