TED 2 Review – A Raucous, Raunchy, Bromance Ride

AddThis Social Bookmark Button

TED 2, from Universal Pictures, presents an edgy, frat house, party bus weekend, trip as they travel the extremes of acceptability skating the point of no return with sophomoric jokes and counter culture references.

Written and Directed by Seth MacFarlane, TED 2 stars a host of very familiar faces including Mark Wahlberg, Amanda Seyfried, Jessica Barth, Giovanni Ribisi, John Carrol Lynch, Sam J. Jones, Patrick Warburton, Michael Dorn, John Slattery, Dennis Haysbert, Ron Canada with Liam Neeson, Morgan Freeman, Tom Brady, Patrick Stewart, Jimmy Kimmel and Jay Leno.  Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild served as co-writers along with Macfarlane.

TED 2 opens with an historic pairing as the Ted, voiced by Seth MacFarlane, and the love of his life, Southie girl, Tami-Lynn, played by Jessica Barth, marries her favorite cuddly bear. The wedding scenes introduce the cast of characters, Guy and Rick, a gay urban couple who show up sporadically through the film, the minister, Sam Jones played by Sam J. Jones who also returns mid film.

The two, John and Ted, are still living a bromance life, even after Ted marries Tami-Lynn and after only a year the marriage begins to deteriorate.

The newlyweds move into the terrible two’s and are just past their first year anniversary when, we find the romantic cuddly bear Ted has been replaced by the beast as he pours over the bills and his loving wifey is tossing the iron skillet at him as they trade insults over her spending and his penis.

Ted, of course, after the fighting wants to make up. Tami-Lynn will have none of it. So Ted solicits advice into the female psyche, from fellow cashier Joy who suggests they have a baby to improve their marriage.

Suddenly Tami-Lynn and Ted are snug as a bug in a rug and are cooing love birds again until the one minor and seemingly obvious necessity absent from our anatomically incorrect bear stops the traditional baby making method.

This is where our story begins to unfold as Ted and Tami-Lynn find their wild and raucous pasts have made them less than an ideal choices for adoption and drug use has deteriorated her vagina and rendered it useless. A shock to all.

John, played by Mark Wahlberg, while happy for his best friend, is missing a relationship. The absence of his drinking, bromance bud as left a vacancy in his life that we find out later is being filled in a darkened room behind the safety of a computer screen with the countless couplings available through the Internet.

The boys are a bit freer in their description of the computer files and the need to destroy the hard drive on the off chance anyone finds the drive and reconstructs the contents.

Soon the desire to have a baby has been sidelined as the Commonwealth has determined Ted is property and suddenly his life dries up, not recognized as human he losses all he has done to establish himself.

Ready for the fight, the two find the toughest Boston constitutional lawyer who introduces them to, his fresh out of law school granddaughter, Samantha a pot smoking, uber legal brainiac, pop culture illiterate played by Amanda Seyfried.

What follows is an extended frat house weekend as the three prepare for an unprecedented Constitutional battle. Seriously into the weed, the three exam the varying strains and effects with gusto which brings into play the various methods used for consumption.

Jay Leno appears in cameo. Liam Neesom appears with as a paranoid cereal eater, Tom Brady, New England Patriot Quarterback shows up with solid balls and Morgan Freeman appears as a Constitutional lawyer, who explains the meaning of citizen.

As I usually don't go for the sophomoric humor and TED 2 was better than I thought. Granted there are moments of raunchy mess as the two visit a sperm donor clinic and lots of penis, pot and partying jokes, along with visuals of a counter culture freedom.

Macfarlane and Wahlberg kept the jokes coming and Amanda Seyfriend mixes the life of legal and illegal with the same enthusiasm as our two best buds, John and Ted.  

Barth carries the silly intellectually challenged blonde stereotype story line and love’s obvious blindness effortlessly. The talented cast shows the ability of an actor to be and to be believed.

TED 2 opens June 26, 2015. Check local listings.

Haute Tease

  • Maze Runner: The Death Cure - An Explosive, Solid, Wild, Sci-Fi Winner

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    Maze Runner: The Death Cure, from Twentieth Century Fox, presents the third installment in the wildly popular Maze Runner Franchise, with sharp, crisp stunts and special effects, unexpected twists and shocking turns and an explosive, climatic, finale.

  • Something Rotten Review – Raucous Surprises, a Roaring Good Time

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    Something Rotten!, Broadway’s newest musical, is so fun it's hard to say for sure who was having a better time at the St. James Theater the other night, the audience or the actors and musicians on stage.  

  • Eleven Boston Cops Wounded, Two Critically, by Body Armor Wearing Suspect

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    Boston police officers shot and killed a gunman after he opened fire on responding officers wounding eleven and critically injuring two who are now fighting for their lives, in what has been called a domestic disturbance gone bad.

  • HL Lifestyle: The Cost of Child Care in Every State

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    Deciding to have a child is arguably the biggest decision a person makes in her life. With parenthood comes a profound responsibility that ranges from protecting to educating. While countless joys accompany parenting, there are costs too — and they take effect even before birth.  

  • Beltway Insider: Obama Delivers State of the Union; Rubio Handles GOP Rebuttal; Brennan, Hagel Confirmations Stalled

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    President Barack Obama delivered the first State of the Union address of his second term, this week, directly calling congress into bi-partisan support of his agenda to move forward much needed reforms.

  • Beltway Insider: Obama/Syria; Health Crisis/FGM; Trick Job Numbers; Election 2016; Julian Assange

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    President Obama has proposed in his current budget a robust humanitarian assistance package for allies carrying the frontlines burden of the continued Syrian Civil War with the five surrounding nations receiving the bulk of the proposed funding.  

  • FINIS ‘Duo’ Underwater MP3 Player Review - Swim with Swagger

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    Duo,” a recently-released underwater MP3 player from FINIS Inc., a highly advanced subaquatic music player lets both serious and recreational swimmers listen to their favorite songs, instrumentals and more while water-bound and without earbuds to boot!

  • Martial Vivot Launches Exclusive Luxury Grooming Product at Barneys New Downtown NYC Opening

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    Gentleman's Grooming Guru, Martial Vivot, is introducing a sophisticated box set grooming line for hair to be sold exclusively at Barneys' new downtown flagship location. The luxurious store opened its doors this week in Chelsea at Seventh Avenue and 16th Street in New York City.

  • Beltway Insider: Trump Implodes; UK/Russia; Parkland Killer/Student WalkOut; Matt Damon; Stephen Hawking

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    The ENOUGH Movement, birthed from the Marjory Douglas Stoneman High School Massacre, organized a National Walkout across America, in every city as they dedicated themselves to ending gun violence in our schools and remembering those senselessly killed.

  • New York City Opera Opens Season with Triumphant Production of Anna Nicole, Co-Produced With Bam; Announces Major Fundraising Appeal

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    New York City Opera will open its season on September 17th with the opera Anna Nicole, by composer Mark-Anthony Turnage and librettist Richard Thomas. The Opera is a co-production with BAM, and will open both companies’ seasons.

  • The President's Speak: Ballmer, Dauman Talk on The Economy, Recession and The Biz

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    Three of biggest names in the media business today, NBC’s Jeff Zucker, Viacom’s Philippe Dauman and Microsoft CEO Steven Ballmer recently gathered for one powerhouse summit at the Midtown Manhattan headquarters of publishing giant, McGraw-Hill.

  • Celebrity Interview: The Real Dish on Bravo’s First Real Housewife Alex McCord

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    For Alex McCord and her hotelier husband Simon van Kempen, the roles of reality TV stars on Bravo's hit series, "The Real Housewives of New York" is not something they ever expected and initially turned down.

  • Interview: Kevin Roundtree, Mr. Mom, Business Manager, Dad

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    Actress and baby model, Kaleah Roundtree is making waves as she and her business manager father Kevin, an African American Mr. Mom, and Dad, begin a new push in the talented toddlers' career.

  • London Town Review - Charming Coming of Age Film

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    London Town, Dutch Tilt Film, Killer Films and Culmination Productions, presents a delightful coming of age story just as London is entering into the Margaret Thatcher Conservative Revolution and punk rock inspired by The Clash is rising.

  • Cast: Art and Objects Book Review – An Exhaustive Reference Manual For Artists, Scholars and Designers

    AddThis Social Bookmark Button

    CAST: Art and Objects Crated Using Humanity's Most Transformational Process, an exhaustive reference manual, captures the beauty and history of how our world is made utilizing the mastery of seven experts and 800 images to present an instructional resource.


Login Form